Do you guys have a whole cohort of people who have similar names to you, whose email you constantly get? There’s a Nextdoor Group in another state I can’t seem to get unsubscribed from. Then there’s poor Grace from Texas, whose mom must have a similar name because I get all of her progress reports and report cards from school. I don’t read them, by the way. Because I feel like somewhere poor Grace would be mortified if the other Sarah Lacy or Stacey Lucky or whatever her name is did.

Sometimes I go to the effort to unsubscribe. Sometimes sites won’t let me, and sometimes I just have so much spam that comes in my inbox everyday, I just passively delete this kind of thing along with it.

But I’ve gotten sucked into following what’s going on with a production of The Nutcracker in Wyoming. I must have gotten more emails about this production than I do actual shows my children are in. So many emails in fact, that I started opening them because I started to wonder…Are these actually meant for me? Is there a production of The Nutcracker that I have some involvement with and forgot?

Nope. But now I’m emotionally invested.

And there has been some drama. So many rehearsals, the T-shirts are arriving late and everyone’s pissed about it, and all DVD orders need to go to JAKE IMMEDIATELY. But the good news is: It’s all coming together.

God, love how hard these parents (?) and teachers (?) have been working to pull this thing off. I developed such a warm spot for this production that I started daydreaming about it in off-hours. Was this some sort of elite dance school? Some sort of hapless Waiting for Guffman Nutcracker? The highlight of everyone’s year or just another school obligation?

I don’t know why I liked thinking about this and reading the email updates so much. On one hand, I feel creepy and voyeuristic. I wondered if I should let them know that I’m on this list (where everyone is openly CC’d) by mistake. But at this point it had gone on too long. And I really wanted to know how the show turned out.

I can’t really explain it. Except to say, I’m not really on social media much anymore so I felt like this was a weird arcane version of it. Maybe a weird, actually more human version of it.

I thought about ordering a T-shirt. You know, to show my support. I knew from my emails that they were going to look “amazing” and there were a limited number in most sizes left. (Actually, I have a hunch that’s just marketing. He seems to say again and again there are a limited number left…) I thought it would make a good story when I wore the shirt. “Oh, this? Funny story. I got confused with a Sarah Lacey in Wyoming and then got way too invested in a school production of The Nutcracker…”

But then I saw that the T-shirts have to be picked up at this week’s performances. I was musing about this during dinner last Saturday, and Paul made the mistake of asking what I was thinking about. A quick Google search showed there is indeed a Sarah Lacey in Wyoming who seems to have a connection to the school where the performance is taking place. Poor Sarah Lacey must keep asking why she’s not getting the updates (and where her T-shirt is! Don’t worry! There are limited shirts left in all sizes!)

I asked Paul if I should let them know I’m the wrong Sarah Lac(e)y and he screamed, “No! Because you won’t get any more updates on future shows!”

“Wouldn’t it be great to just show up?” one of us said.

This fantasy actually got as far as looking at showtimes and researching plane tickets. Alas, Eli and Evie have their own concert this week. Paul suggested I send a check for $50 to Jake at the attention of the school asking if a T-shirt and a DVD could be mailed to our San Francisco address. But I don’t want to freak Jake out. And we don’t know Jake’s last name.

So in case anyone reading this is attending a performance of The Nutcracker in Wyoming, please tell them Sarah Lac(e)y said to break a leg! (And grab me a T-shirt if there are extras.)

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